No Fastfood and Killer Workouts

Hello!

So, i'd like to say that i haven't been posting because i've just been so busy kicking butt that i haven't had time but quite the opposite is the case. I haven't been focusing on eating healthy at all so there hasn't been anything to post. :(

I guess it was about the end of January that i fell off the "eating healthy wagon" and i didn't just fall off and get a few bruises. I completely forgot to tuck and roll and ended up with some broken bones. I was seriously depressed for a good 2 weeks. Depression of any sort is very unusual for me but i just couldn't shake the feeling. I had just let myself down and i was just completely and utterly disappointed in myself. I have failed at my fair share of diets but this was different. I would be sitting there and consciously telling myself "i shouldn't be eating this" or "i'm full, i should stop here" but i would just keep cramming stuff in my mouth until i was well beyond miserable. I just wanted to cry. I have never been that out of control in my life. It was a weird feeling and honestly kind of scary. I don't know what caused me to constantly binge eat but thankfully it has passed.

I was talking with my very healthy-eating conscious friend, Mat, about how upset i was with myself for continuing to fail and he pointed out that i was trying to go from nothing to SUPER HEALTHY EATER overnight. He suggested i make baby steps and slowly adjust to a healthier eating lifestyle. So, he made me promise to not eat fastfood for a month. A WHOLE month! I reluctantly agreed. Here i am 5 days later and i feel good!! I find that even when i over eat, i don't feel sluggish and just all around crappy like i did after eating fastfood.

The downfalls are that it is more expensive and more time consuming to not eat fastfood. That is true if you eat at home or eat out. I've also had to think outside the box sometimes. On my running days i definitely don't have time to cook and it is often too late to go to a restaurant but Mat pointed out that there is an CO-OP organic Market on my way home that has a hot bar so i can quickly grab something there for dinner instead of going through a drive thru somewhere. One hurdle i see in the distance is taking food over to friend's houses for TV shows. Previously we would grab KFC or Chick-fil-a but now what do we do?? For this first week we are going to take the take-n-bake pizza, Papa Murphy's, but i have no idea what to do for week two? I'll have to talk to my "food coach". haha

To go along with this new fastfoodless lifestyle, my work has started a lunch time workout group to go along with out Biggest Loser contest. So not only am i running 2 days a week but now i will be working out at least 4. I'm pretty excited to have some people to workout with. To keep me motivated and accountable. Today was just day 2 but i am already so sore i can barely walk up stairs. The lead guy really kick our butts. I like it! Bring on the burn! (Am i insane?!)

I'm excited to see how i feel after giving up fastfood for a month and increasing my workouts. Will i even be able to tell a difference? Will i ever go back to fastfood?? Will i survive the stairs?? I'll report back mid-March!

//Stacy//

P.S. Have no fear! I didn't mean i won't post again until mid-March... just meant i will review this subject again at that time. :)

Dieting - Keep Calm and Carry On

Last night i started writing in a journal again. Like manually writing. Foreign concept these days, right? My hand sure thought so. It was cramping before the end of the first page. As I was writing my first entry I thought it might be good to share some of it on here. Sorry, you won't get the full thing. We all know that somethings just aren't meant for the internet. Besides, if i put it all on there then what would be the point of having a journal??

There is just something about writing by hand that is so nice. Something about the perfect lines of text that are just too formal. I like to skip lines randomly, doodle, and sometimes even do a little sketch. I can't do that here in this ever constricting maze of black and white. I did learn that apparently i like to  quote myself and blow them up and accent them like they do in magazines. I'll try to find a way to accent them on here but i can tell you, it wont be as pretty. :)

You know what's nice about writing by hand? 

There's no auto correct to derail your thoughts.

...There's just other thoughts to derail your thoughts. 

Write faster, hand!!

Of course my first journal entry would be about my biggest challenge right now, my weight. I have always struggled with my weight. I don't have it as bad as some. I'm not at any health risk, i'm just [forever] chunky. I don't know what it will take for me to get something done.

--- Dedicated --- Determined ---

I am constantly on and off diets. I'll count calories and make excellent progress only to crash and burn. It's a problem. I am aware but that doesn't stop me. I think "I should only have 1 cookie" or "I am full so i should stop here" but i still cram a second or even third cookie in my mouth and then feel horrible afterwards. Or i will eat everything on my plate because "it taste so good" like i'm never going to get it again... everything is mass produced.

It will be there tomorrow

It is like i don't have any willpower but it is there. I know it is. I've seen it! Hellooooo....?? I think it is almost like a form of depression? The more upset I get about eating, the more i eat. What sense does that make?? None I tell ya!!

For example just last week I was doing a great job on my diet and then i fell off a little on Wednesday because i was craving Far East Black Bean from Wok Hay. I was full halfway through but i just kept eating until it was all gone. I felt horrible that i ate the whole thing and i tried to get back on track but i was really down on myself. Then Friday i ate at a pizza buffet and then went to a party (aka beer) so i failed H.A.R.D! I don't even think Lose it can count that high. After that I lost hope and motivation. I didn't make a grocery list so i didn't go to the store.

I just wallowed in self pity instead of doing something about it

I know these things and i'm a believer that if something is making you unhappy that you should CHANGE it so why do i let myself wallow??? It MUST stop ---- there will be fail days and I need to just take them in and carry on.

Keep Calm and Carry On

That saying just took on new meaning...

Eating healthy is just so hard. It takes so much time to prepare and then clean up. Yes the food is delicious --- i feel 100x better --- and i'm never miserably stuffed. BUT time.... it is so precious and i'm trying to workout too.

They aren't kidding when they say healthy eating is a LIFESTYLE...

It takes up SO. MUCH. TIME.

"weh" right? Grow-up.

Maybe i could try one of those meal plan website that i got from Laura. I wonder if they generate grocery list? That's the annoying part.

Alright enough whining about my laziness and lack of willpower. It is my bedtime and sleep is very important to me. The important thing is that I don't give up.

Keep trying and keep changing! 

//Stacy//

A Big Week of FAIL 1/16 - 1/22

Hey there! Ready for an embarrassing recap? Great! Because i have one for you.

In a nutshell a fell off my diet after Tuesday and I only exercised twice the whole week. Yea.... Here's what it looked like:

Monday: Attended my mamaw's 92nd birthday dinner at Shoney's. I showed restraint and avoided the buffet. I picked a plain hamburger with sweet potato fries. No exercise this day.

Tuesday: A lady at work and I decided to try some weights. I badly need to incorporate weights into my workout routine because the more muscle you have the more calories you burn! I have a theory that the reason it is so much harder for older people to lose weight is because of all the muscle mass they have lost over the years. I know I am no where near as strong as i was in high school when i was constantly playing sports and it has only been 10 years. So you can imagine someone in their 40s would have considerably more muscle loss.

Wednesday: This was our planned "catch up on TV" night and I was really craving some Far East Black Bean from Wok Hay so i declared Wednesday a slight "cheat day" (dinner only) and totally veg'd out. Thus starting my downward spiral.

Thursday: I thought i was okay, I was back on track! I ran 4 miles because I'm training for a 10k in February. As a result I had plenty of extra calories by the end of the day. I was feeling good!

Friday: But then Friday happened... I didn't even make an effort to fit in exercise and a friend that i haven't seen in a very long time was throwing a house warming party. Before the party i went to dinner with 2 other friends and we went to a pizza buffet, need i say more? Then at the party i had my fair share of beers which were 100 calories a pop. I resolved just not to talk about Friday. Kapesh?

Saturday: I started the day by sleeping in and then went to a friend's baby shower. I had planned to do a Kinect workout and make a grocery list after i got home but it was so dang gloomy and i had a horrible headache (not hangover related, i swear!) So i ended up laying in bed all day and reading Mockingjay. I was even too lazy to finish logging my calories this day.

Sunday: Didn't even try to log calories this day. We went to breakfast at James' mom's house and she always cooks a metric ton of food and i think i ate a pound of bacon. When we got home all i could think about was finishing Mockingjay so i put the rest of my life on hold and just read for hours. It was really nice actually.
__

So, needless to say i really lost focus with my eating and exercise this week. I think it started on Monday. We didn't have anything to watch while we ate dinner so we decided to rewatch Battlestar Galactica. It was even better than i remembered! We watched both pilot episodes which are 1.5 hours each. I usually go to bed around 10 but we didn't finish watching those until after midnight. Then, i couldn't resist reading at least a chapter or two of Catching Fire so i stayed up until about 1:30am and had to get up at 6am. I have not been that tired in a very long time. I could barely put my thoughts together the next day at work. As a result of my loss of sleep, i dragged all week. This sucked my motivation right out of me. I've always made sleep a priority but the lesson here is sleep is VERY vital to living a healthy, active lifestyle.

I'm not going to recap the other resolutions because nothing changed. The whole week was a fail and I feel horrible about it. Emotionally and physically. Last week my run was really easy because i had kept up with exercise and eating the right stuff but when i ran this week i thought i was going to die before i reached a mile. I was breathing hard and my muscles were burning. Not to mention, my stomach problems are back this week with a vengeance. Besides all these physical setbacks, i am just really disappointed in myself and that's a horrible feeling.

I did realize that these recaps really help. I actually thought i was on target with exercise last week until i recapped it and saw that i only did something twice the whole week! i was shocked. Same with my eating, i thought i was fine some days because i was under budget but when i looked at what i really ate, it was not a pretty picture. One night for dinner i had 3 fried cheese wedges and 2 beers. What kind of dinner is that, people? I mean seriously! No wonder i only lost .4 of a pound even though i was under budget! It makes perfect sense now. I think it will help me keep focus and understand things if i do my recaps on time.

My game plan for this week:
It's already too late to go to the grocery store this week because Thursday is my birthday and i have more important things to do then cook and do dishes all day! :) Then we are hosting a friends game night on Friday and there will be lots of snacks and adult beverages involved. So i'm going to just try to make the smartest choices i can tomorrow (Wednesday) and try not to over do it on Thursday and Friday. Saturday I will make a grocery list and go to the store Saturday or Sunday and my diet will start back Monday!

As for exercise i plan to lift weights tomorrow with the lady from work and then run or do the kinect on Saturday if i'm not too hungover. (at least i admit it, right?) That's still an embarrassing amount of exercise but at least it is better than nothing.

My goals for week of 1/30 - 2/5
- Recap on time
- Get to sleep on time (around 10-10:30)
- Exercise 5 times

This is really early for such a huge backslide. I hope i got it out of my system. :(

//Stacy//